Who am I?

For the next several posts, I think I will tell a little bit about who I am with all my deep, dark secrets and facts about my family and my life. My name is Stacey and I was born in 1961. That puts me somewhere in my forties (although, without a calculator I can never remember 40-what). I have lived most of my life in and around Atlanta. I have been married twice. I have two kids...although I have been pregnant six times. I have two dogs (which count as kids). I work from home part-time.

I am very organized, but not a clean freak. I love to eat out when I get the chance. I have many dreams and aspirations. One is to tend a garden (veggies and flowers). Right now, finances don't permit, but one day I will spend all my free time "playing in the dirt". Another aspiration is to finish a novel I started a few years ago. The outline of the book is ready as are many chapters. It just takes a very long time to write 75 - 100,000 words!

If I could live my life over there are many things I would do differently. I would absolutely finish college. If I had the money and the time, I would go back to school right now!

I love to see beautiful sunrises and sunsets with lots of clouds and color. I love seeing geese fly in formation. I love the mountains and the ocean. I used to love roller coasters, but now they kinda make me nauseated.

I am not pretty or skinny or mensa smart. But, I do love people and animals. My grandfather used to say you could judge a man's character by how he treats animals. There is also a Bible verse that states pretty much the same thing. And I totally agree with that concept.

"I think there's just one kind of folks. Folks." - Scout, To Kill a Mockingbird

Tired!

Today was the walk-a-thon at Jordan's school. I am so incredibly tired. But as usual we bought the bbq chicken dinners and Josh and Jenn came to dinner. It's so nice to have company instead of all of us eating alone in separate rooms.

Speaking of American Idol (were we speaking of American Idol?)...I can't believe Chris was in the bottom three! I can't fathom that his fans bailed on him just because he did a ballad type song instead of his usual R&R. He is wonderful no matter what music he performs. I am however, glad to see Ace finally gone. He may be nice to look at, but he is not that great of a vocalist.

Mark's health is still an issue. Everything seems to be "breaking". He has doctor appointments coming up for ailments that are literally from one end to the other. His behavior towards me has been exemplary the last couple of months. He has hardly lost his temper at all. Some of this may be attributed to the health crisis he is experiencing. Or it may be because I am going to counseling and now I have someone to affirm my position. No more mind games. I can now tell someone how I felt or what I thought or what I perceived and an objective person helps me to see realities and doesn't dismiss what I experience as a character flaw. What a refreshing concept!

It's late and we have soccer tomorrow and I need to prepare the slides for Sunday (if anyone sends me the material!).

"When you do dance, I wish you
A wave o' th' sea, that you might ever do
Nothing but that." Shakespeare - A Winter's Tale

Forgiveness

I saw an enemy today. Someone I hadn't seen in years. In fact, I thought this enemy was gone. But there she was in living color. I thought about forgiveness. I purposely avoided her because I didn't want to have a conversation and because I look terrible today after a difficult night with a sick kid. I questioned in my mind whether or not I had really forgiven her for treating me badly. I don't know her spiritual condition. She could be a believer by now. It would be much easier to forgive if she were to apologize. But, that probably won't happen. She would have to get out the Atlanta phone book and call nearly everyone in it to make peace with the many she has injured. But forgiveness is my obligation no matter how I feel. So I pray today for blessing upon her and her family and I pray that I would forgive her completely. That way, praying for her blessing would be a desired act on my part and not just an act of obedience. God, help me to obey...even when I don't "feel" like it!